About: Debbie Johansson
- Website
- http://deb-johansson.moonfruit.com
- Bio
- Debbie Johansson is the author of young adult mystery novels and historical fiction. She has written two young adult novels, which are both in the editing stages. Debbie has also written short stories, articles and has been known to dabble in poetry whenever the mood strikes her. She lives in country NSW, Australia with her husband, two young children, a psychotic pomeranian and six paranahs heavily disguised as goldfish.
Author's Posts
Back to Nature
July 25, 2007 | Leave a Comment
On early morning walks I have encountered horses, cows, rabbits and a variety of bird life, once including an emu. I have also been fortunate enough to encounter a couple of kangaroos and glimpse a platypus in the creek; and all this within easy walking distance from my own backyard. Read more
An Unexpected Diagnosis
June 20, 2007 | Leave a Comment
After the birth of my first child, I breast fed and considered myself lucky that I only had to get up for one night feed. After the morning feed, and going about the usual morning chores, I found myself tired enough to go back to bed. I put it down to what life was like with a newborn baby. Read more
A Balancing Act
June 4, 2007 | Leave a Comment
My mother told me recently it was difficult for both my parents to say they loved each other. She said she had found both my sisters had the same problem saying words of love to their husbands. Either they can’t say it or they don’t say it often enough. I know it is the same for me, for both my husband and my children.
Mother Knows Best
May 23, 2007 | Leave a Comment
‘She’s going to have real problems coping with school’, the speech pathologist told my husband and I about our four year old daughter. How did she know this just by spending 30 minutes with her we wondered?
Holiday Activities on a Budget
May 8, 2007 | Leave a Comment
During the recent school holidays, I was alone for practically two weeks to entertain the children. On a tight budget and close to pulling my hair out, I wondered what I was going to do. I needed to have a plan.
The Perfectionist
April 9, 2007 | Leave a Comment
After watching a television show, I bemoaned to my husband that the idea of leaving the city was to live a stress-free life. In the short time we have lived here, I have found this not to be the case. ‘That’s because you take on too much and refuse to ask for help’, he replied.
I was taken aback at this statement. I wondered to myself if I was really like that, and discovered that I was. Thinking further on the matter I also discovered why.
A normal day in the life goes something like this:
Husband: ‘What can I do to help?’
Me: ‘Nothing’.
I go off and do whatever needs to be done. I eventually begin cursing that I have three things to do at once, as per usual.
Husband: ‘I did ask if you wanted me to do anything’.
Me: ‘There are plenty of things that need to be done, and if I ask for your help, I usually have to wait for it to get done or you get cross because you have to drop whatever it is you’re doing, so I think it’s quicker if I just don’t bother asking and do it myself, so that I get annoyed and cranky that I have to do it and complain that I have to do about three things at once, and then you get cross with me because I don’t ask for help’
I find it difficult to just let go and relax. As my husband likes to say: ‘Don’t sweat the small stuff’, but I can’t help it. Do I thrive in stressful situations, revel in the attention it gives me or am I just headed for some chill pills?
I demand perfection from myself, so naturally I expect it of others. I like things a certain way, and if others don’t do it the way I want, then I get angry and take over. This does not help the children. They try to help, but I get frustrated whenever I see them do it wrong, or they are they slow in doing it.
Recently, with a bout of the flu going around our house, I told my husband that I just couldn’t afford to get sick. So naturally, I got the flu. With only one or two brain cells fully operable, I struggled to get anything done. I watched with impending dread as the ironing pile got higher and higher.
Society places too much emphasis on perfection. Children are expected to be little geniuses before they start school, and if they are not, then there must be something wrong with them. If something is wrong with your child, then you must be a bad parent.
Parenting is said to be the hardest job in the world and is only learnt through trial and error on a daily basis. From the very first moment, you hold your child in your arms, it’s as if the nurse is saying ‘Here, take this; you deal with it’. Nobody tells you how.
In future, during stressful situations, I need to learn to take a deep breath, relax and think that life could be a lot worse. I refuse to let myself be carted off to a padded cell. Well, not yet anyway. That would be worse.
For more information on the perils of perfection, read this article:-
The Perils of Competitive Parenting + Avoid the Competition Trap
http://www.christianitytoday.com/momsense/2007/001/6.18.html
© Debbie Johansson 2007
Stranger Danger
March 22, 2007 | Leave a Comment
There is always a lot of discussion about children not talking to strangers and I agree. However, it can sometimes cause problems when you live in a small country town, for children and adults alike.
Party Poopers
March 5, 2007 | Leave a Comment
When I was ten years old I remember having my first and only birthday party. These days, children tend to have birthday parties every year and the demand is to make them bigger and better than previous ones.
What’s In a Name?
February 20, 2007 | Leave a Comment
When I began working at the local child care centre, the acting Director asked me what I would prefer to be called. I looked at her rather bemused. Then it finally registered that the staff were addressed by their first names. It seemed rather foreign to me that my daughter’s friends would call me by my first name.
Not a Perfect Mum
February 6, 2007 | Leave a Comment
I’m sure you’ve seen those mums before. Immaculately dressed, not a hair out of place and the children are just the same. Everyone wants to be their friend. These mums are involved in numerous community activities and are always willing to help others. Then you look at yourself and your children and think ‘Okay, where exactly am I going wrong here’?