About: Susan Heim
Author's Posts
- A two-year-old girl in India underwent surgery to remove extra limbs after she was born with four arms and four legs. Doctors say she was joined to a “parasitic twin,” which stopped developing in the womb. The fetus’s body parts were then absorbed by the surviving child. The little girl, Lakshmi, is named after the four-armed Hindu goddess of wealth and is considered by some to be a reincarnated goddess.
- A mother and her daughter, Andrea, came face-to-face with Andrea’s identical twin during a chance meeting—a twin neither ever knew existed! Apparently, a husband-and-wife doctor team delivered the twin babies and, without telling the parents, adopted one as their own. The doctors claim that the biological mother knew about the twins and only wanted one, but the biological parents deny the doctors’ version of the story.
- In May 2007, Chris and Lori Coble lost all three of their young children in a horrible traffic accident. Now, Lori is pregnant again, and expecting triplets! Coincidentally, they lost two daughters and a son, and the triplets are also two girls and a boy.
- In August 2007, a Canadian woman gave birth to rare identical quadruplets. All four girls were listed in good condition even though they were born two months early. Chances of having identical quadruplets are about 1 in 13 million, and there are less than 50 sets in the world.
- Over Labor Day weekend, a woman gave birth to Florida’s first set of sextuplets. The five boys and a girl, all weighing between 2 and 3 pounds, were born more than two months early.
- On December 21, 2007, Ashley Patterson, 20, beat 500,000-to-1 odds to give birth to identical triplets in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. A single mother, Patterson was told by doctors that she could never have children as an ovarian cyst was blocking egg production.
- A set of ten-year-old quintuplets is in the midst of a custody battle between their parents in which the father is accusing the mother of “serious psychological control issues” for keeping the children on a strict vegan diet. The father claims she even restricts them from visiting their paternal grandparents because they own leather furniture.
Top 10 Things Never to Say to a Mother of Twins or Multiples
May 8, 2008 | Leave a Comment
1. You must have your hands full!
2. Are they identical? (especially if they are clearly a boy and girl)
3. Did you use fertility drugs?
4. Do twins run in your family?
5. Better you than me!
6. How do you tell them apart?
7. Are they all yours?
8. Which one is the smart one?
9. You’re lucky you got your family all in one shot.
10. I always wanted to have twins!
Greeting Cards for Families with Twins and Multiples
May 1, 2008 | Leave a Comment
If you’re a parent of multiples, you’ve probably been frustrated at the lack of greeting cards that depict twins. Says Angelice Tyson, “As a mother of two-year-old twins, I have experienced the frustration and disappointment of not finding a card to give from my twins to friends and loved ones.” And so she solved her problem by creating her own company, Gemini Greetings, which makes cards for families with multiples. Angelice notes, “As my twins attend numerous parties for playmates, spend holidays with family or just want to send a card to their Nana, they will now have something to choose from . . . and so will other families with multiples.” Her beautiful cards depict twins and triplets in all sorts of variations (different hair colors and ethnicities), and are available for birthdays, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Valentine’s Day. And she’s making more designs for more occasions all the time. The cards are very reasonably priced, and cost even less if you buy them by the box. They’re blank inside, so you can customize them by hand or on the computer. You can even make the birthday cards into invitations for your multiples’ birthday party! I strongly encourage you to check out Gemini Greetings’ line of cards for multiples at www.geminigreetings.com.
My Non-Bonded Twins
April 9, 2008 | Leave a Comment
As the author of two books about raising twins, I hear numerous stories about the special connection between twins. Although researchers have yet to uncover any scientific evidence of a psychic connection between twins, their families often have plenty of anecdotal evidence to offer. In the book, Twin Connections: Stories That Celebrate the Mysterious Bond Between Twins, there are numerous examples of twins who seem to share an unexplainable link. One woman goes into labor, and her twin sister feels the labor pains even though she doesn’t know her sister is ready to deliver! A boy hits his head, and his twin sister gets the headache! And there are plenty of stories where a baby has sensed that her twin is in respiratory distress and has alerted the parents, thereby saving the child’s life.
As I wrote in the Foreword to Twin Connections, my twins share a special relationship. At four years old, they understand each other’s speech better than anyone else. They miss each other if one is home from preschool with an illness. But sometimes I wonder if these aren’t the same feelings that any close brothers might have for each other. I can’t say that I’ve really seen anything that borders on the psychic between them. Perhaps it’s because they’re fraternal and don’t share the same DNA. However, there are plenty of cases where boy/girl or other fraternal twins have displayed uncanny abilities. For instance, there’s a story in Twin Connections where a girl feels a very sharp unexplained pain in her finger. She later finds out it was the exact moment that her fraternal twin sister slammed her finger in the door!
Most of the time, twins love that they have someone who knows them like no other. As one woman wrote in Twin Connections
, “Being a twin is a gift you are blessed with. It is the certainty of knowing there is one person in the world who truly understands you, fulfills you, gives you support and loves you.” I want my boys to have that kind of relationship. But at the same time, sometimes it appears to be unhealthy for some twins, who rely on each other exclusively and shut out the rest of the world. There’s a fine line between a bonded relationship and overdependence. So, maybe my twins have the best of both worlds—the closeness of having someone who’s always there for them, but the distance that allows them to be their own unique selves. They are twins, and yet they are two very different little boys. Bonded or not, they are both incredible just the way they are.
“Twice the Love” Wins Best Parenting/Family Book in Reader Views 2007 Annual Literary Awards
March 19, 2008 | Leave a Comment
(Austin, Texas) Twice the Love: Stories of Inspiration for Families with Twins, Multiples and Singletons (ISBN 1-891846-31-0, Twins Magazine, Inc., 2007) was selected as the best parenting/family book of 2007 by Reader Views Annual Literary Awards. Reader Views Annual Literary Awards were established to honor writers who self-published or had their books published by a small press, university press, or independent book publisher.
“Reader Views reviews more than 2,000 books per year from budding authors who have worked hard to achieve their dream of being published,” Reader Views Managing Editor Irene Watson says. “Our Annual Literary Awards recognize the very best of these up-and-coming authors, all talented writers who we know have very promising writing careers ahead of them.”
The Reader Views Annual Literary Awards are granted in 20 fiction and 30 nonfiction categories, as well as 15 specialized, sponsored categories. The entries are judged by Reader Views reviewers, all avid readers with a wide range of experiences, considered experts in the respective fields.
Reader Views is currently accepting submissions for the 2008 Literary Awards. Entry information, registration forms and further information can be found online at http://www.readerviews.com/Awards.html. Reader Views is an Austin, Texas, based company. They started December 2005 as a volunteer-based book review service. Shortly after the company’s birth they expanded into offering publicity services to authors. Now they are a one-stop center for budding authors. For more information, visit www.readerviews.com.
About Twice the Love: Stories of Inspiration for Families with Twins, Multiples and Singletons
Published in conjunction with TWINS magazine, Twice the Love is a compilation of inspirational stories written by parents and other family members about the joys and challenges of raising multiples. Susan M. Heim, former Chicken Soup for the Soul editor and founder of the TwinsTalk web site (www.twinstalk.com), collected these true tales about the joys and challenges of loving twins. Stories reflect a variety of topics, such as the special bond between multiples, typical crazy days in the life of a family with twins, challenges encountered in pregnancy or childhood, humorous situations created by multiples, adopting twins, and much more.
Twice the Love: Stories of Inspiration for Families with Twins, Multiples and Singletons (ISBN 1-891846-31-0, Twins Magazine, Inc., 2007) may be purchased at www.twinsmagazine.com/twice_the_love.html or www.twinstalk.com/twinsshop.
What Is Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome (TTTS)?
March 11, 2008 | Leave a Comment
How often are we intrigued and amazed by the sight of identical twins? Little do we know how often identical twins don’t survive pregnancy or birth due to a deadly complication called Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome. TTTS kills more babies every day than SIDS, yet hardly anyone outside the twins community has heard about this potentially fatal condition. Here is a description of TTTS by the Fetal Hope Foundation:
TTTS or Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome is a disease of the placenta. It affects pregnancies with monochorionic (shared placenta) multiples when blood passes disproportionately from one baby to the other through connecting blood vessels within their shared placenta. One baby, the recipient twin, gets too much blood overloading his or her cardiovascular system, and may die from heart failure. The other baby, the donor twin or stuck twin, does not get enough blood and may die from severe anemia. Left untreated, mortality rates near 100%.
The cause of TTTS is attributed to unbalanced flow of blood through vascular channels that connect the circulatory systems of each twin via the common placenta. The shunting of blood through the vascular communications leads to a net flow of blood from one twin (the donor) to the other twin (the recipient). The donor twin develops oligohydramnios (low amniotic fluid) and poor fetal growth, while the recipient twin develops polyhydramnios (excess amniotic fluid), heart failure, and hydrops. If left untreated, the pregnancy may be lost due to lack of blood getting to the smaller twin, fluid overload and heart failure in the larger twin, and/or preterm (early) labor leading to miscarriage of the entire pregnancy.
One in 7 pregnancies with identical twins is afflicted with TTTS. Before the condition could be diagnosed by ultrasound, less than 10 percent of TTTS twins survived. Those who did survive were often greatly impaired. Now the odds of survival have significantly improved through medical intervention during pregnancy and after birth. Many parents of TTTS twins (as well as those parents who have lost twins from this condition) have benefited greatly from support groups. Two such organizations are the Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome Foundation at www.tttsfoundation.org and the Fetal Hope Foundation at www.fetalhope.org.
Please take a moment to watch this moving slide slow about a couple’s journey through TTTS: http://www.ssmpfiles.com/ourtttsjourney/index.html.
The Study of Twins
February 9, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Twins, especially identical twins, have fascinated humankind for thousands of years. Scientists have been equally enamored with twins because of their usefulness in research. Charles Darwin’s cousin, Francis Galton, was one of the first to suggest in 1875 that studying twins could offer valuable insights into the study of nature versus nurture. Are we more influenced by genes or the environment? Identical, or monozygotic, twins share 100 percent of their DNA. Thus, when scientists compare a particular trait between sets of identical twins and sets of fraternal twins (who are no more alike than any other siblings), they can determine that any additional likenesses between the identical twins are most likely a factor of their genes, rather than the environment. But the research isn’t always fool-proof. For the most part, scientists have found that intelligence is a heritable trait. However, when identical twins were raised in vastly different socioeconomic backgrounds, the twin placed with the poorer family had a lower IQ. So, environment may have an impact on the expression of particular genes.
Although twin studies are being conducted in laboratories and research centers all over the world, they are not without controversy. Josef Mengele, medical director of the Auschwitz-Birkenau concentration camp of World War II, did experiments on 3,000 twins, mostly children, in his effort to create an Aryan race. Only 157 children survived his deadly tests. Fortunately, today’s twin studies are much more reputable and respected. They have provided valuable information on human behavior and health-related issues. One such study showed that autism is largely inherited, a comfort to parents who were told in the past that it was caused by “aloof parenting.”
In addition to established research centers, such as the Twin Studies Center at the California State University Fullerton and the Minnesota Twin Family Study, researchers travel to the annual Twins Days Festival in Twinsburg, Ohio, to sign up identical twins for research studies. Scientists swab saliva, take fingerprints, and fill out questionnaires in an attempt to gather valuable data from twin subjects. Twinsburg attendees have been involved in studies of hearing, fingerprint differences, hair loss, skin diseases, and much more. With DNA testing, twins are also able to confirm whether they are identical or fraternal.
Although some twins may not enjoy being the subject of scientific studies, experts say that most twins feel it’s a privilege to be able to help scientists better understand diseases that affect the human species. Indeed, twins are not only a blessing to their families, but also to medical science and humankind as a whole.
Getting Toddler Twins to Sleep
January 18, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Bedtime difficulties are extremely common during the toddler years, especially with twins. Parents hoping their sleep issues will be over once their twins leave the early baby years are often in for a big surprise, especially when toddler twins learn to climb out of their cribs or toddler beds. Here are some strategies to try to get your toddler twins on a sleeping schedule:
1. Make sure they get lots of physical activity during the day so they’re worn out at night. I can always tell when my twins haven’t had any outdoor playtime because they’re much less likely to sleep at night.
2. If they’re still napping during the day, it may be time to start cutting back on the amount of sleep they get during the day. Some kids do give up their naps at this age. They’ll be a lot more ready for bed if they haven’t been over-rested during the day.
3. Twins feed off each other’s energy. You might need to separate them just to get them to sleep. If they must share a bedroom, perhaps you can lay one of them down on a sleeping bag in the master bedroom, and then transfer him/her to bed once he or she is asleep. Being alone might bore them enough to put them to sleep.
4. Let them “read” by themselves in their beds. They think they’re “getting away” with not having to go to sleep, and yet looking at books might make them sleepy.
5. If they pester you with requests for drinks or the bathroom, make a rule that there’s only one potty break and one drink break after bedtime, and be tough. Don’t let them whine and convince you that they just MUST get up again! Tell them ahead of time that they’re only allowed one time up. When they yell, “Mom, I need another drink,” don’t ignore them because they’ll just yell more. Say instead, “You already had your break. Good night!” Let them know you’re acknowledging them, but not giving in.
6. You might need to make their bedtime later. Some kids are just natural “night owls.” I know some parents who are able to get their kids in bed by 7:30 or 8:00, but mine have always done better with a 9:00 bedtime.
7. Make sure they have very little soda, caffeine and sugar, especially after dinner. Allow them a small glass of milk at night as milk has natural sleep-inducing qualities (but not so much that it makes them wet themselves at night).
8. Make sure they have a comfort object to sleep with, such as a special blanket or stuffed toy. Try to reserve it only for bedtime so they look forward to being able to cuddle with it at night.
9. Make sure the room is dark enough at night. If the moon shines in their room, get blinds. However, you might still need a nightlight for them if they get scared. My twins know that no “monsters” will come around when the blue light (their nightlight) is on in their room.
10. If they’re afraid to fall asleep because of nightmares, teach them that they’ll have happy dreams if they think of something they like before they go to sleep. Coach them to think about playing in the park or going to the zoo at bedtime.
11. Follow the same “winding-down” routine every night. Make sure they have a warm bath, soft pajamas, and cuddling during story time. Teach them how to watch the clock, and when the “big hand reaches the top,” it’s time to go to bed. They’ll have fun telling YOU when it’s time for bed.
Of course, these methods aren’t necessarily going to work the first night, but if you continue to follow them, you’ll soon be able to notice a difference. Remember to be consistent and firm, and your bedtime difficulties will be resolved.
Interesting News Stories About Twins and Multiples in 2007
January 1, 2008 | Leave a Comment
Multiples are always newsworthy when they are born, but in 2007, there were some especially unusual stories about twins, triplets, quads and quints. Here is just a sampling of some of the items that made the headlines:
The Land of Twins
December 16, 2007 | Leave a Comment
It sounds like something out of a strange science-fiction movie, but there’s actually a town in Nigeria known as “The Land of Twins.” That’s because the little village of Igbo-Ora has an unusually high incidence of natural twin births. Scientists are puzzled as to why this occurs.
Nearly 5 percent of the births among the Yoruba community in Igbo-Ora result in twins, compared to about 0.5 percent of all births internationally. Some people believe it might be because the villagers eat a lot of yams, which have a natural hormone called phytoestrogen that may stimulate the ovaries to produce more eggs. Others believe it’s a matter of genetics; perhaps the women in Yoruban families have inherited the tendency to release more eggs.
Fortunately, the Yoruba believe that twins bring good luck and are a gift from God. This is different from some other areas of Africa, where they believe that twins have special powers and can hurt people they don’t like. Before missionaries entered Africa and changed certain superstitions, some African communities would kill twins and even their mothers, believing that a twin birth meant that the mother had been sexually active with two men.
Interestingly, the Yoruba also believe that twins share a soul. Thus, if one twin dies, a wooden figure called an “ibeji” is made in place of the dead twin. The other half of the soul from the deceased twin will reside in the ibeji, they believe, which the mother then dresses and feeds as if it were alive. When a surviving twin becomes an adult, he assumes responsibility for the ibeji. If both children die, the mother participates in an elaborate ceremony where she dances with two ibeji figures to represent her dead children.
Women who wish to become pregnant with twins without the use of fertility technology might want to consider a diet heavy in yams!
Recommended Reading: Identical Strangers
November 29, 2007 | 1 Comment
Suppose you were adopted and decided to try to find out a little information about your birth family. In the course of your investigation, you discover that you have an identical twin that you never knew existed! And, on top of that shocking news, you learn that you were separated as infants as part of a secret study on twins. This story may seem unbelievable, but it actually happened to Elyse Schein and Paula Bernstein.
In their book, Identical Strangers: A Memoir of Twins Separated and Reunited, we learn how these two women made this momentous discovery, their journey to learn more about their history and the study, as well as their efforts to absorb this shocking news and establish a relationship with each other. In reading their accounts, we learn more about what it means to be a twin, especially when two people share identical DNA but different life experiences. Elyse and Paula uncover startling coincidences between them, but also stark differences. This leads to the age-old question: Nature or nurture…which is more influential?
The authors are brutally honest in the book about their changing feelings toward each other. Elyse notes of her sister, “Sometimes I am elated about her appearance in my life. Other times I feel alienated by this experience, angry at the doctors for separating us, incredibly sad that Paula and I didn’t have time together growing up, just for us.” At one point, Paula notes, “Being with my twin seems to bring out the worst in me.” But by the book’s end, they find they share a bond that cannot be broken. Says Paula, “But as different as we are, we come from the same stock. In each other, we recognize a kindred spirit. Getting to know our twin and seeing the life we might have led has made us more certain of who we are. Although we don’t always fit together neatly, we are missing pieces to the same puzzle.”
Whether you’re a twin, the parent of twins or simply fascinated by twins, you’ll find Identical Strangers to be compelling reading. Learn more about this incredible book at www.identicalstrangersbook.com.
