Open The Door
Upon leaving my Bible study one morning, I was positioning my three year old in her car seat when my attention was caught with the sound of a thud. The wind had swung my door open, hitting the van parked next to me. I quickly accessed the damage and was relieved there was only a light coat of red on the car next to me. Read more
Read the Instructions or Else!
Kenzie’s dream was a lofty one — to sit upon her own throne on her 9 th birthday and unwrap her gifts. So she talked me into buying a Strawberry Shortcake inflatable chair to be used to fulfill not only her royal ambitions but another dream as well. When we moved into our current home four years ago she exacted a promise that I would decorate her room in pink. As you guessed it is still blue, but for one Strawberry Shortcake throw pillow, a Strawberry Shortcake poster, and an inflatable pink throne she would consider her room officially decorated until she Read more
DNA Test
Every Christmas eve our family gets together and exchanges gifts.
I was talking to my nephew and his wife (who is pregnant) and told my 2 year old son William that Sarah had a baby growing in her tummy.
William immediately turned to my nephew and asked him, is it yours! To which my nephew replied, I don’t know…maybe we need a dna test!
Teresa Atkins
Holyoke MA
Nakey Boy
We have 3 boys 14,8 and 5…well of course the oldest was at an age a
few years ago that he hated to see his little brothers naked…so he
would always say ewww nakey boy…well my youngest was about 2 and my
hubby took them swimming…they were all done and in the change
room…and an elderly man walked by from the shower unclothed..and my
son pointed at him and innocently said “eeewww nakey boy” well my
poor husband wanted to crawl under the bench…but just smiled and
shooed him on his way…
Submitted by Karen of Family Friendly Market
Never Married
My son was 5 when I took him out to my college campus one day. We were sitting in the food court when out of the blue he said, “I don’t think I’ll ever get married. I’ll have to search the whole world for someone and won’t be able to make it home before dark.”
I don’t know what made him think of it, but it was too cute to forget.
Submitted by Amy Fox of Fox Art & Design
Bouncy Balls
My son (2) and I were at CVS, while in line, a long line, he picks up two bouncy balls. He puts them up on his chest and says, ‘Mom look chi chis…big chi chis.’ Everyone in line was giggling…I was so embarrased!
Submitted by Alondra
Bring Me a Drink
It’s past bedtime and my son of 3 years keeps asking for something to drink
(to extend bedtime) and we keep telling him no. He continues to ask….can
you bring me up a drink? My husband finally yells upstairs that he needs to
be quiet and go to sleep or he will get a spanking. My son quickly yells
back, “When you come up to spank me, can you bring me a drink!”
Submitted by Michelle McConnell
Designs by Michelle Custom Bracelets
http://www.custommadebracelets.com
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Sick Cows
We were on our way to church one Sunday morning.. My children in the back seat got into a discussion about cows.
“Mommy, can cows get sick?” asked my 5 yr old daughter. My oldest son, 11yrs old, decided that he would answer her question.
“Yes, Caitlin, cows do get sick! You know they are sick if they have soured milk.”
My husband and I tried not to let them see us laughing. But it really was funny!
Rhonda Twitty
http://www.my.ws/rhondastwitty
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New Batteries
When a friend of mine was weaning her son she told him that the milk was all
gone. That it didn’t work any more. Being a kid of the 21st century his
answer to her was: “Needs new batteries momma!”
Submitted by Cynthia Powell
Chicks & Cubs
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Footprints
Last week, my almost- 3-year old daughter said, “I don’t want to wear my shoes. I want to go footprints.” Instead of barefoot. It was so sweet!
Submitted by Mary Carter
Gifts of Wit
How About a Goat
My boy, Komayl, was about 2.5. He had been successfully going to the
bathroom when he needed to all week. He was still getting a chocolate
reward most of the times he went on the toilet.
One night, as I lay beside him in bed as part of the bedtime routine,
we were singing round after round of Old McDonald. At the end of a
verse, he would supply the name of the animal we were to sing in the
next verse. Eventually it was my turn to supply the name of the animal.
At some point, he announced he had to go pee, so we went pee. After
peeing, he wanted a chocolate as usual, but I was out of them, so I
said, “I’m so sorry, Komayl. The chocolates are all gone.” Back in
bed and me wanting to get his mind off the chocolate as quickly as
possible, I offered another animal name hoping to get his mind back
on the song. I said, “How about a goat?” It was quiet for an extended
time, and I could “hear” his brain thinking. Then he announced with
consternation, “I don’t want gooo-aaat!” (He thought I was suggesting
goat as a replacement for a chocolate.)
Submitted by Dara Becker
Modest Clothes
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Not Silly
My 3 year old, Joshua, is really into dinosaurs, so we usually goof around the house pretending to be dinosaurs. Well I guess I must have goofed around too realistically and unintentionally scared him. I apologized and said, “Oh, honey, no, I’m sorry, Mommy is just being silly.” When he responded with, “No. You no silly, I’m Joshua!”
Submitted by Adry
Adry’s Baby Creations
Kitty Whiskers
When my son Imanni was 4 years old he had a fascination with his preschool safety scissors. He wanted to cut everything and practically did if they were in his reach. One day as I was getting out of the shower, I noticed that our kitty was curled up in the bathroom sink, which by previous experiences he only did that when he was scared. I got close to the kitty to see what was wrong, when I noticed something very different about him, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it. After about minute or so, I realized his whiskers were gone. Including his eyebrows. After composing myself, I asked Imanni, “Honey, what happened to the kitty’s whiskers?”
“I don’t know Mommy.”
“Well, why are they all over your bed?”
“They must have fallen off?”
Submitted by Adry
Adry’s Baby Creations
Bob the Builder
One night I was trying to fix a program on my computer. My son came in and asked what I was doing. I told him that I was trying to fix the computer. He ran out and came back with his “Bob the Builder” hat, googles and wrench and said “computer fixed.” It was so cute.
Debi Voris
www.scrappingtreasures.com
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Laker’s Man
My oldest son now 8 was 2 yrs old at the time trying to sing the patty cake song it went like this “patty cake patty cake lakers man”. Yes we were fans of the los angeles lakers and watched all their games!
Victoria Pirillo - OurGV - http://www.ourgv.com/vp
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Does that mean this is the wrong arm?
My son was sitting in the back of the car in his carseat staring at his arms. I was getting ready to let him out of the car when he asked me, “Mommy, what arm is this?” I said, “That is your right arm.” He then looks at his other arm (his left arm) and says, “Does that mean this is the wrong arm?”
Sarah Grack
Mary Kay
www.marykay.com/sgrack
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Peanut M&M’s
My 4-year old son was enjoying a small bag of peanut M&M’s one day when he enthusiastically offered one to me. I told him no thank you and his reply was “You gotta have one Mom, M&M’s with peanuts are really good and they will give you a penis”.
Wendy Wood - All WAHM
Is there a baby in there, too?
I was 8 months pregnant with baby number 4, when my 2-year old son walked into my bedroom while I was dressing. Seeing me standing there with only a bra and panties on, his eyes became large as saucers as he asked, pointing to my stomach, “Why are you so fat?” I reminded him that mommy was having a baby. He slowly walked behind me, pointed at my rear end, and asked, “Is there a baby in there, too?”
Lisa Pallardy (WAHM of 6)
www.BarkTalk.com - Where Dog Lovers Gather
