What About Dads?
What About Dads? So much of what we read and talk about has to do with moms of children with special needs. What about dads? They have feelings, too. With a little insight from my husband, Michael, we hope this will be the first of many articles that may recognize and help all the “special” dads out there. We all know the stages of grief we go through when the dream of f typically developing child in our life is gone. Men are very emotional beings in their own way, and their makeup allows them to be in the anger mode and stay there much longer than women. Traditionally dads are used to being the caretakers and breadwinners in the family and they are accustomed to having some sort of control over what happens to their family. As we all know, when a doctor tells us our child has some kind of a disability, we have no control. They are the “fixers” and when they first realize that they can’t fix what is happening to their child, and to their entire family, it can be devastating. In usual circumstances, they can usually step up to the plate and take care of whatever needs fixed, but raising a child with a disability changes the playing field a bit. When they first learn of their child’s disability, the fixer in them just does what they have to do to repair as much of the situation as possible. They are always the pillar of strength for the whole family’s sake; while on the inside they are crying and screaming—just like mom is usually doing on the outside. One of the most productive ways my husband and I take advantage of the fact that he is the “repair man,” while I am the emotional one, is that we feed off one another. Jim Brickman’s song says it very simply, “You are strong when I am weak, you are the words when I can’t speak…” Almost immediately, when one of us is having a bad day, the other musters enough strength for both of us to get through whatever may be happening that day (testing, blood work, doctor’s appointments, therapy, etc.). To dads everywhere, the small “repairs” help them feel they are gaining some kind of control over their family situation. The better we moms and dads are at this, the more good days we will have. Another way dads can feel they are gaining some control is to continue to be the “fun” parent. They can fix things by finding ways to play with all of their children, regardless of disability. Maybe they just need to fine-tune the activities to meet the needs of all their kids—something that comes naturally to dads! Dads have a lot to offer to their special children and do so much to support and strengthen their whole family. Give recognition to them today by thanking them for being the pillar of strength and for fixing things the best way they know how.
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What Should You Name Your Twins?
If you’re expecting twins, you may find that it’s hard enough for you and your partner to agree on one name, let alone two! My husband and I had a difficult time. For some reason, we agreed almost immediately on two girls’ names–Sydney and Hayley–but figuring out boys’ names was a different story. Needless to say, we soon found out we were expecting two boys! Finally, we decided we’d each pick a name, and as long as the other person didn’t violently object to it, we’d go with that. I liked the name Caleb, and my husband was okay with it, so that was a “go.” My husband liked the name Austin, but I really didn’t like the association with the Austin Powers movies, so I told him we could use Austin only if we spelled it like Jane Austen, giving it a more literary connection. Therefore, we finally settled on Austen and Caleb. As often happens, they appear now to be the perfect names for our kids, as we couldn’t imagine them being anything other than “Caleb” and “Austen.”
Another issue in naming twins is whether to give them sound-alike names or different ones. Sound-alike names can be adorable, but experts usually advise that twins have very different names in order to help them establish their own identities and not confuse people. Nevertheless, I haven’t heard of too many twins who were permanently scarred by having sound-alike names, so you and your partner should do what you feel is best!
Finally, if you’re still stumped as to what to name your twins, I suggest you check out the Social Security Administration’s list of most popular names for twins in 2005. Here it is:
1 Jacob, Joshua
2 Matthew, Michael
3 Daniel, David
4 Faith, Hope
5 Ethan, Evan
6 Taylor, Tyler
7 Isaac, Isaiah
8 Joseph, Joshua
9 Nathan, Nicholas
10 Madison, Mason
11 Hailey, Hannah
12 Madison, Morgan
13 Alexander, Andrew
14 Elijah, Isaiah
15 Jordan, Justin
16 Mackenzie, Madison
17 Alexander, Nicholas
18 Caleb, Joshua
19 Emma, Ethan
20 Jonathan, Joshua
21 Emily, Ethan
22 Alexander, Benjamin
23 Andrew, Matthew
24 Benjamin, Samuel
25 James, John
26 Matthew, Nicholas
27 Brandon, Brian
28 Ella, Emma
29 Alexander, Zachary
30 Dylan, Tyler
31 Hannah, Sarah
32 Madison, Matthew
33 Christian, Christopher
34 Faith, Grace
35 Jacob, Jordan
36 Jacob, Matthew
37 Jaden, Jordan
38 Alexander, Anthony
39 Brandon, Bryan
40 Emily, Sarah
41 Ethan, Nathan
42 Jacob, Joseph
43 Jordan, Joshua
44 Landon, Logan
45 Olivia, Sophia
46 Ashley, Emily
47 Elizabeth, Emily
48 Elizabeth, Katherine
49 Jeremy, Joshua
50 John, Joseph
51 Nathan, Noah
52 Nicholas, Noah
53 Nicholas, Zachary
54 Alexander, Christopher
55 Christopher, Michael
56 Jacob, Zachary
57 Jason, Justin
58 Abigail, Allison
59 Amy, Emily
60 Andrew, Nicholas
61 Benjamin, William
62 Christopher, Nicholas
63 Ella, Ethan
64 Gabriella, Isabella
65 Isabella, Sophia
66 Jeremiah, Joshua
67 Megan, Morgan
68 Samuel, Sophia
69 Aidan, Ava
70 Alexander, Alexis
71 Andrew, Anthony
72 Andrew, Ethan
73 Andrew, William
74 Ava, Olivia
75 Caleb, Jacob
76 Jacob, Nicholas
77 Jacob, Ryan
78 Jake, Luke
79 Jayden, Jordan
80 John, William
81 Mark, Matthew
82 Natalie, Nathan
83 Nathaniel, Nicholas
84 Ryan, Tyler
85 Abigail, Emily
86 Anna, Emma
87 Anthony, Michael
88 Anthony, Nicholas
89 Austin, Justin
90 Benjamin, Jacob
91 Brian, Brianna
92 Christopher, Matthew
93 Daniel, Samuel
94 Gabriel, Michael
95 Haley, Hannah
96 Jada, Jaden
97 Jayden, Jaylen
98 Jonathan, Joseph
99 Kyle, Ryan
100 Logan, Lucas
101 Logan, Luke
102 Matthew, Ryan
103 Parker, Payton
104 Parker, Peyton
105 Reagan, Riley
106 Tanner, Tyler
Maybe Pets Are Like Kids After All
Just when you survive the kids…there are the pets to deal with.
(Parenting/Humor)
Thoughts on Christmas Past and Future
I love Christmas time and the opportunity to give back to others.
The most important way I give back is to share the good news of
Jesus. The birth of Jesus is the reason we celebrate Christmas. I
have several memories of childhood that always made Christmas
special! As a child I was taught it is better to give than to recieve.
I always loved Christmas shopping for others and very seldom had a
list of Christmas wants.
I remember one Christmas - when I was around ten. I saved up
my money and bought everyone a present. It always gave me
comfort to know that someone liked my present. That year for what-
ever reason I had requested a viewmaster and a suitcase. I was
very happy - I had recieved the gift I asked for !
About two to three weeks before Christmas - I would
decorate Grandma’s house for Christmas. She had this set of red
bells that lighted up and hung in the window. She had a small
artificial Christmas tree. I can remember going down time to shop
and in those days - religious music for Christmas was played outside
with speakers. It was a joyful happy time - a time when people
stopped to talk and care about each other.
I remember one Christmas as a teenager - I was in a Christmas
play. It was a very small part - but it took a lot of time and effort to
memorize my lines. The best Christmas play I was ever in - was a
play that was held outdoors at the local college by a local arts
council. I played the part of a census taker and I was to collect
taxes and names. They told us to act like we were actually taking
names and not to respond to any current day questions. It was a
great witnessing tool. One of my favorite lines was: “Have you seen
the Baby Jesus.” It was neat to hear their responses - some would
say: “Yes, that is why we have come - we have journeyed from
Newton, IL” or “We just came to see what kind of production this
was”.
Of course as a young child - I would go to bed very early. I was
hoping Santa would arrive early. Since, I went to bed early - I was
up around 3:00 a.m. - ready to open presents. I had loving parents
and a loving grandmother - they would get up and watch the opening
of presents. They always made Christmas so fun and special.
Now, that I am an older adult - I focus on the true meaning of
Christmas - the birth of Jesus and spending time with family. Sadly,
this year I won’t be able to spend Christmas with Grandma - she has
gone home to be with the Lord. I am sure grief will try to
overshadow the Christmas season - but I know she is in a better
place and is no longer suffering. I have found the best way to deal
with depression is to pray, read your Bible and find activities to get
involved in or to serve others. If you are busy helping others - you
will not have time to focus on your problems or griefs.
In years past - I have invited families who do not have anyone
to enjoy Christmas dinner with us ( my parents and I). Sometimes
we even purchased Christmas gifts for the children and clothes. It is
regretable - but most of the time I did not recieve a thank - you.
But, I did it because that is what Jesus would do and it gave me a
blessing by helping others.
As Christmas approaches - remember the reason for the season
- The Birth of Jesus! If the holidays are a time that depression is a
problem - start taking steps to make sure are busy helping others.
There are plenty of places to volunteer: a local nursing home, a local
day care center, Salvation Army or maybe a local school. Family time
is very important - the years fly by. So, it is so important to enjoy
each moment of family time. Why not make this Christmas season -
a season of love and joy and wonderful memories.
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What About Santa?
I was brought up in a christian home and my parents taught me
about Santa Claus. Children must have a child-hood and part of
growing up is having a time to believe and dream. I am in my
forties and an ordained pastor and founder of a ministry. So, Santa
did me no harm - just gave me wonderful childhood memories. In
today’s fast paced world - if a child believes in Santa past the age of
four it would be extremely rare.
I do not believe if a child believes in Santa - it will harm a
child. A christmas tree can be viewed as a beautiful gift of God and
the presents placed underneath - are a way to brighten a child’s or
adult’s Christmas day. The only danger that there would be is if you
started worshipping the christmas tree or santa! If you raise a child
up in a christian home with a good christian example - the child will
know the difference between make believe and reality.
If your child asks straight forward: “Is there a santa?” - then it
is important to answer the question truthfully. Then, explain the
difference between reality and fantasy. As you explain the
Christmas Story explain that God is real and the story of Jesus’ birth
is the truth and it really did happen.
I was a very trusting child and never really questioned about
Santa. I was probably in first or second grade before I asked: “Is
Santa real?” Of course, my parents were upfront and said: “No”. I
guess, deep down I had known for some time - but it was fun to
dream about santa and his reindeer. I have wonderful memories of
Christmas and Santa! I personally believe it would have done more
harm than good to have deprived me of the fantasy of Santa.
Children are only little once and they will someday reflect on
childhood memories. So, this Christmas make some positive
memories with your little ones and your family. Make this a
Christmas to remember.
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Christmas Is The Celebration of Christ’s Birth
Celebrate Christ In Christmas
It is amazing how things have changed since I was a child. First, as a child – I was taught the true meaning of Christmas was the birth of Jesus! Christmas was also that special time when I might get that special toy - I had dreamed of since last Christmas. But, you see my parent’s didn’t go along with whatever was popular – if they believed whatever was popular was not the best choice for me – then I didn’t get it (I was given a more traditional toy). I wasn’t deprived – I was just taught values and that it was o.k. to go against the crowd – if what the crowd was doing didn’t glorify or please God! The only time I got toys and candy was at Christmas (and for Easter I received candy).
Today, it seems like children get toys everyday. Parents go into debt to make their children happy. Personally, I think children would be better off with more quality time with their parents. The best thing for a child would be a full time stay at home mom and a full time dad who gives quality time to his children. Toys only give temporary happiness and memories of good times spent with parents will last forever.
My parents usually have a family type dinner and exchange one present. We started doing this because it is the Lord’s birthday (or at least the day we celebrate his birthday) and he has blessed us with a wonderful time to spend together as a family. This is a just a thought – but let’s celebrate Christ in Christmas. Start a family tradition of reading the bible and showing children the true meaning of Christmas. Teach your children it is better to give than to receive. Adopt a family in need and show the love of Jesus!
The Mommy Competition
My twins were conceived naturally, without the use of technology. In fact, I was on birth control, and they were an accident! I carried them to 39 weeks, when they were born vaginally at 7 lbs. 13 oz. and 6 lbs. 9 oz. They spent no time in the NICU and came home from the hospital a mere two days later.
Don’t you just want to smack my smug little face? Brag, brag, brag . . . I was reading a message board for mothers of multiples and found similar statements: “Mother of triplets . . . delivered vaginally . . . carried to 37 weeks . . . weighing 6 pounds each . . .” I’m thrilled for this lady. But is it really necessary to rub it in that she didn’t require a C-section? That her babies weren’t premature?
And let’s be honest with ourselves: Women like her and me had very little to do with our easy pregnancies or healthy babies. We’re not “supermoms” or “breeders extraordinaire.” The fact is, we just got lucky. So why do I—and millions of women like me—feel the need to “one up” each other when it comes to our pregnancy experiences?
Of course, this “gloating gene” isn’t exclusive to mothers of multiples.
Did I mention that my first-born son (a singleton) was born at 42 weeks, weighing 9 lbs. 13-1/2 oz., and I delivered him naturally with NO EPIDURAL?
Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself. Okay, I admit, I’m thrilled that my pregnancies went well. I’m tickled pink (or, in this case, blue) that my sons’ birth weights were so high and that I birthed them vaginally.
But I also know that millions of women aren’t so lucky. Some women take years to conceive a longed-for baby. Often they go through numerous rounds of expensive and exhausting fertility treatments. They may spend a greater part of their pregnancy on bed rest. Perhaps they delivered prematurely, and their precious babies spent months in NICU, barely holding on to life.
These parents are the real heroes—not me. They wanted to be parents so badly that they endured the worst to bring their children into the world.
So, shame on those of us who flaunt the ease with which we became parents. We have the right to be grateful, yes, but not to minimize others’ experiences. We need to be more sensitive.
The bottom line is, there is no right or wrong way to have a baby. There is no better or worse way to become a parent. Every experience is unique.
For those of us with multiples, it’s easy to get caught up in the special circumstances of their birth. Our children are, indeed, miraculous. They draw lots of attention. When someone tells us how precious our twins are, we couldn’t agree more! It’s so easy to chime in: And I wasn’t even trying to get pregnant! Or, I carried them to full term!
The funny thing is, I came very close to not having anything to brag about. Before my four children were born, I suffered two heart-breaking miscarriages. I had surgery to remove a fibroid that was blocking a fallopian tube and impeding successful implantation. And if that hadn’t worked, I most certainly would have pursued further options to become a mother. Fortunately, I didn’t need to, and four sons later, I’m bursting with pride!
But again, I got lucky. My treatment worked. For some women, it doesn’t. For many, the outcome isn’t as fortunate. I remember the pain and desolation I felt after my miscarriages. And my heart continues to bleed for those mothers who are now in that position.
And so my hat goes off to all mothers . . . no matter the path they take to get to parenthood. I’m thrilled for you. I’m proud of you for doing whatever it takes to become a mother. We are all heroes for loving our children so much, for sacrificing our health and our lives to bring them into the world. Yes, we deserve to brag a little, but let’s not forget to support our sisters who suffer.
And the next time a mother brags to me that she breastfed her twins for two years, I’ll resist the urge to snap her hefty-sized bra. I won’t feel guilty that I ran out of milk after just a few months. I’m just so happy to be a mommy . . . that both of us are mommies . . . and we each did it our own way.
Will They Ever Sleep at the Same Time?
The first six months of my twins’ lives is a blur. My husband and I were so sleep-deprived that we wore T-shirts labeled “Grump 1” and “Grump 2.” Honestly, those first six months felt like six years! It seemed like our babies had a secret pact to make sure that at least one of them was awake around the clock. As soon as one fell asleep, the other woke up. Of course, as soon as one baby awoke, one of us would race to comfort him for fear he would wake up the other twin. Better to have only one awake, we reasoned, so at least one parent could get some shut-eye. In babies’ first three months of life, it is essential that they eat every three hours, so this schedule was unavoidable. But by the time they reached six months of age, we knew we had to do something or else we would never have tolerable personalities (or a sex life!) again. We finally decided that the only way we could get them on a schedule was for us to set the times, NOT the babies. If one of the twins woke up after only a few hours, we decided to let him cry for a while instead of rushing to pick him up. We no longer worried about waking the other twin, and we often found that either the dozing twin would sleep right through the crying, or else he’d wake up and they’d both lay there “talking” to each other for a while. Miraculously, it didn’t take long before they figured out that we weren’t going to come running if it wasn’t wake-up time and they gave up their cries, either sleeping or playing until they knew we were willing to be available. That six-month mark was a very welcome turning point in our ability to get some rest!
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Dealing with Loss
Dealing with Loss, far from home
The idea of losing a loved one is almost unimaginable; we hope to never have to experience such pain. When the time comes, however, it can be greatly more powerful when far from home. The military offers many opportunities for travel, for experience, for adventure, all of which can not be denied or taken fro granted. The downside though is the separation from family, especially in the event of loss. I had an experience like this several years ago.
I received a phone call early one morning, my mom was on the other line telling me my dad had passed away. While I not spoken to him in several years, the impact of that loss was more than I could bear. To compound my sorrow was the fact that at the time we lived in Texas, my dad had died in Pennsylvania. My husband was on deployment for six months and our three daughters were still in school. I had made plans to go home for a few weeks that summer and we were too leave in 3 weeks. I was not able to change my tickets and missed the funeral. When I did arrive home three weeks later I went to the cemetery and cried. He was gone, he had been alone in his final hours and I could not even make for his funeral.
I am not sure we are ever prepared for such experiences, life takes us in many directions – but not all are understandable. From this one I believe we learned the importance of family more, the importance of availability even when we do not think it is possible. There is always a way, if we look and we ask for the direction to go. While this is not solely related to the military, it is a lesson for us all.
A Simple Life
“Happy 12th”, my husband said as he cuddled up to me in bed. What did he say, I asked myself as I began rubbing the sleep from my eyes? I asked him to repeat it, as it made no sense to me. He said it again. Then it dawned on me. Oh my God! I had completely forgotten our wedding anniversary.
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Spiderlicious Treat
Spiderlicious Treat
By
Toni Kelley
Spooky creatures and things that go bump in the night are all signs that Halloween will soon be here. Shrieks of delight ring through the night as children of all ages enjoy Haunted Houses, hayrides and trick or treating. Mountains of sugary treats are creeping ever closer as moms everywhere tremble with fear. Well here is a great way to have a healthy snack for all those ghoulish gatherings that is sure to be a spooktacular hit.
Ingredients
Peanut Butter
Ritz Crackers
Raisins
Pretzel Styx
Directions
The first step is to gather all the ghosts, witches, goblins and vampires. Next, place all your spooky ingredients on a clean dry surface. Spread some peanut butter on one side of a cracker and then place 3 or 4 pretzel styx in the peanut butter on opposite sides so that they are pointing slightly outward. These are the legs for our edible spider. Next, spread more peanut butter on another cracker and place it on top of the other cracker making sure it is slightly off center. The last step is to give your spider some eyes. Place two raisins in the peanut butter you left open between the two crackers.
There you have it, a fun, healthy, creepy snack perfect for any ghoulish affair.
Happy Halloween!
Mom Standard Time
Mom Standard Time means…I’ll get to it when I can!
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Twins’ Special Bond
I always wondered if my twins would have that special bond that some twins seem to have—that emotional connection that goes beyond most sibling relationships. Because my twins are fraternal, I had my doubts that they would share this bond. After all, they’re just like any other siblings except they happened to share a womb and be born on the same day. They don’t share the same genes as identical twins do. And, indeed, they are very different. Both have blond hair and blue eyes, but the physical resemblance ends there. Their features are entirely different. And their personalities are unique, as well.
And indeed, for the first few years of their lives, I didn’t see any evidence of a twin bond. But now that they’re almost three, I’m suddenly seeing signs of its development! For instance, Caleb wasn’t sleeping well when his bed was on one side of the room and his brother’s bed was on the other side. Five nights in a row, we found Caleb sleeping with his brother in his little toddler bed, the two of them entwined together. So we moved their beds side-by-side. Amazingly, they went right to sleep in their own beds and slept beautifully. Apparently, they just needed to be closer together.
The other day, I kept Caleb home from preschool because he had a cold. At first, he was fine and seemed to enjoy his “alone time” with me, but after a few hours he started saying, “I want my Austen. I want my Austen!” It obvious he was feeling lonely without his twin around, and he was overjoyed when they were together again.
Some parents worry that multiples can be “too close.” If twins only want to be together to the exclusion of cultivating other friendships, this may be a valid concern. But in my boys’ case, I’m thrilled to see signs of this twin bond developing. Wouldn’t it be great if all siblings could share this special relationship? What a wonderful gift to grow up with your best friend by your side!
Surviving Toddler Twins
When I was going through the really exhausting days of infancy with my twins, I remember thinking to myself, Boy, I can’t wait until they can walk and talk. Once they’re a little more independent, it will be so much easier!! Now that my twins are toddlers, I feel like a complete idiot! How could I have thought it would be easier? They went straight from walking to running—in opposite directions! They have no fear of anything. One may be climbing out of bed as the other is scaling the floor lamp. They throw everything. They have tantrums. They say “No!” to every request. They completely ignore me when I tell them not to do something. I don’t mean to sound discouraging, but life is tough!
Take this morning, for instance. I decided to take the boys to K-Mart to shop for shoes and diapers. Caleb refused to get into his car seat until I promised to play their Winnie-the-Pooh movie on the portable DVD player. Once we arrived at the store’s parking lot, it took me fifteen minutes to drag the stroller out of the back of the van, roll it around to each side of the car and place each boy in the stroller. (I also double-checked to make sure I had my purse as I was so distracted on two previous trips that I left it in the car!) Once we got inside, there was no way we could bypass the Halloween display smack-dab in the front of the store, so we spent ten minutes there with the twins handling each of the toys and then me trying to pry them out of their hands without making them scream so that we could move on. I hurriedly made our way over to the shoe department to look for shoes for the twins. The toy department is unwisely situated on one end of the shoe department, so I attempted to stay on the opposite end to avoid having the twins glimpse the toys. Wouldn’t you know, the rack of shoes I needed just happened to be on an end cap facing the toys!! So, in order to get the boys to cooperate in trying on shoes, I had to promise them we’d visit the toy aisles next. Finally, we had the shoes and headed over to the toy section. That was another twenty minutes as I again wrestled with them over toys (while a store employee hovered over me, no doubt making sure we didn’t break anything . . . Why is it that I can never find a store employee when I actually need help?). A few tears later (from me, not the twins), we were ready to head over to the diaper section to get that big box of diapers to juggle along with the double stroller. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of being lured in by the sign that said, “Boys’ outfits, $6.” Every time we got close to a rack of clothes, Austen’s little hand slipped out like lightning, pulling items from hangers and sweeping entire stacks of shirts from shelves. (Why do stores make their aisles so narrow? Even my one-seat-behind-the-other double stroller is too wide!) Then both boys decided they’d had enough of looking at clothes. They started to engage in an all-out fight! They were biting and hitting each other. What could I do? I couldn’t yell in the store or put them in time-out. They’re too big for me to carry one, plus manage a double stroller and a box of diapers. If I let them both out, they’d run in different directions. I had to keep placing my hand between them and fiercely whispering, “NO!” in the hopes that no one would notice their naughtiness. Meanwhile, Austen acquired five angry red bite marks on his arm from his brother, which I was certain that everyone would notice. In desperation, I abandoned my quest for clothes (which they really didn’t need anyway) and headed for the check-out aisles. Naturally, only two lines were open and I picked the slowest. When we reached the cashier, Austen instantly spied the candy conveniently displayed by the register and swiped several candy bars to the ground. The aisle was too narrow for me to move the boys away from the candy, so I had to wedge myself between the stroller and the candy while they hit me in the gut trying to reach the candy. At last, we made it out to the car (where Caleb again fought being returned to his car seat) and headed for home (with the DVD playing, of course).
So, what was I saying about life being easier after the twins leave babyhood? Okay, toddlerhood isn’t all bad. I certainly love their sweet little kisses and cuddles, the way they like to wrap a blanket around themselves like a cape and play “Super Baby,” their sweet little voices as they say “Mama” and “Dada,” and the excited look they get on their faces when I agree to let them watch Caillou. But when the toys start flying and the fighting begins, I find myself whimpering, Surely things will get easier when they reach school-age… Just a few short years away!
Just When You Think You’re Safe�Terrible Threes
Neither of my daughters went through the terrible twos. They were both delightful toddlers, with just the typical curiosity-driven behaviors of dialing foreign countries on my cell phone and hiding food under the bed so it could be discovered later when my mother-in-law was visiting (”What is that smell?”).
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Fascinating Facts About Twins
There are a lot of interesting myths, rumors and questions surrounding the phenomenon known as twins. Let’s sort out the facts from the fiction:
Why Are Twins So Different?
People who don�t have twins frequently assume that multiples are exactly alike. Although some twins may be difficult to tell apart from a physical standpoint, their differing personalities often give them away!
My own twin sons have radically different personalities. One is very verbal. The other excels in athletics. One will eat anything that�s put on his plate. The other turns up his nose at everything. But my twins are fraternal, so I expected them to be like any other siblings who just happen to share a birth date. They are two completely different people. But how does one explain personality differences when twins are identical and share the same genes?
Experts say this is possible because human development is not determined solely by our genes. For example, if twins share a placenta but one has a �better connection� to the nutrients it provides, this twin may be bigger or display other differences as a result of being better fed. Scientists also speculate that natural chemical changes in our genetic material may affect the way certain genes dominate. This could explain why identical twins tend to show more differences as they get older and don�t spend as much time together�their natural chemical changes affect their development as individuals. And identical twins have different fingerprints, so obviously certain features are determined by something other than just genes.
A friend of mine with identical twins tells me that one of his boys has a personality that�s similar to his, while the other is more like his mother. Did each twin just happen to bond more with one parent and acquire more of that person�s characteristics, or is something else at play? Scientists are still trying to figure out these mysteries! Perhaps that�s why identical twins are frequently used in scientific experiments. Their genes are the same, but the children are still different. How fascinating!
Encourage your twins to develop their own personalities, and make sure you appreciate them for their differences. Being shy is no less valuable than being outgoing. And being a bookworm is just as interesting as being an athlete. Allow your twins to have their own interests, and never try to force one child to be more like the other. Don�t insist that they both join Little League if one�s just not interested. Let them explore what makes them happy, and celebrate the wonderful mystery of your different twins!
Halloween Treats
Kid Tested and Mom Approved Treats for the Young and Old!
Spiders:
1 (12 oz.) pkg. chocolate chips; 1 medium can of chow mein noodles (use only the amount you need and freeze the rest); 1 pkg. M&M‛s candy. Melt chocolate chips in microwave (if needed, add 2 to 4 tablespoons water to thin chocolate). Stir in noodles. Drop by the spoonful onto waxed paper. Add two M&M‛s for the spider eyes.
Slush Drink:
1 pkg. lime gelatin; 1 cup sugar; 4 cans or more (up to 2 quarts) 7-Up; 4 cups boiling water; 3 cups pineapple juice; 1 bottle of maraschino cherries (just add a few cherries - not the whole bottle). Mix all ingredients together except 7-Up. Place in container with a lid. Freeze four to five hours. Remove from freezer when mixture is slushy. Fill glasses one-half full of slush. Fill remainder of glass with 7-Up. Or add the 4 cans for a larger serving size for a party treat in a glass punch bowl or pitcher. Add cherries for added spooky effect.
Popcorn Treats:
1/2 cup candy corn; vegetable cooking spray; 4 cups miniature marshmallows (use the colored ones for cool colors); 8 cups popped corn (use the kind without butter). Lightly coat 13×9 glass or metal pan with cooking spray. Cut each piece of candy corn in half lengthwise. In double boiler on low heat, or microwave, melt marshmallows, stirring constantly. Remove from heat. Add popcorn and stir to coat evenly. Slowly add candy corn and stir. Using wax paper, press mixture evenly into pan; let cool about one hour. Cut into 24 squares.
Black Kitty Kats:
1 cup crunchy peanut butter; 1/3 cup water; 2 eggs; 1 chocolate cake mix (I make it from scratch with wheat flour); M&M‛s (plain - or peanut if you choose to use plain peanut butter); red-hots; 1 small jar or can of coconut pieces (choose the coconut or the candy pieces below for kitty whiskers); 1 small jar or can of orange cake-decorating candy pieces. Beat together peanut butter, eggs and water. Gradually add cake mix. Mix well. Roll and form cookie dough into 1-inch balls. Place on ungreased cookie sheet. Flatten balls with bottom of glass dipped in sugar - a jelly jar will suffice. Pinch out two ears at top of cookie. Add M&M‛s (eyes) and redhots (nose). Press fork into dough to form whiskers and fill with coconut pieces or cake-decorating candy pieces after cookies come out of the oven. Bake at 375 degrees for eight to 10 minutes. It should make 4 1/2 dozen.
Face Paint:
1 tsp. cornstarch; 1/2 tsp. water; 1/2 tsp. cold cream; 2 drops food coloring. In a small mixing bowl, combine all ingredients, mix well. Place in fridge for two hours and apply to dry face. Let set at least 20 minutes before going outdoors. (This is not an edible recipe but will not cause a health risk should it somehow end up in the mouth.)
Chocolate Halloween Eyeballs:
1 pkg. seedless grapes; 1 to 2 cups of chocolate chips; 1 pkg. red-hots; wax paper; different-colored toothpicks. Wash seedless grapes and drain. Spread out onto paper towel and pat dry. Transfer onto wax paper. Melt chocolate chips and cool slightly. Pour onto room-temperature grapes and/or dip them into chocolate mix. Within one minute, stick a red-hot into the middle of a chocolate-covered grape. For better eyeball effects, make a circle around the red-hot with vanilla frosting. Insert toothpicks into the side of the treat. Eat right afterward or share chilled eyeballs with friends and family.
NOTE: As always, supervise younger children by cutting portions into appropriate bite size.
©2006 Jodie Lynn
Why?
Don’t you just sometimes feel tired of so many things going on around us?,.
I am sitting in front of my desk advertising my business, and reading emails and all of a sudden the phone rings, I already have this gut feeling it was going to be the school, why? well becuase since I decided to send my kids to school diferent things have been going on, and for what? I mean do we the good boys have to stay home because the bullies can’t keep their hands to themselves,..
Working Moms
Being a Mom sure is not an easy task. We are entitled to be more than one person a day. We become Doctors, Teachers, Friends, Story Tellers, Taxi, chefs and so on. We choose to work at home for many reasons, we need to be there for our kids, to be there for sickness, to help them at homework and to see them grow. It is very difficult as a Mom to go out to the world and work, because we really do not want to miss out on the growing stages of the kids. While some of us stay at home, most moms really need to go out and work, sometimes some of us do both, like me for example, I as a mother of four, work at home and work outside of home as a Sales Associate.
The Courtship of Eddie’s Mother
The Courtship of Eddie’s Mother
When it comes to my son Eddie one song that stays on my mind is the opening song for the television series The Courtship of Eddie’s father, do you remember it, “People let me tell you ‘bout my best friend.” Well that song was an absolute inspiration for me when naming my son. But ultimately I named my son after my father, Edward Mack. But it is that song that rings in my head when I think of my son.
My son came back from his vacation potty trained as my brother and his wife said he would. I love them for that, and could never repay them for the time that they took out for Eddie. Eddie enjoyed a wonderful summer of playing at the beach, cookouts, Summer Bible School, Six Flags, and going to the movies. It wasn’t until we went to one of the Kiddy amusement parks that turned my summer into a nightmare.
There we are having fun riding on the rollercoaster and then taking pictures with some of the characters when a tornado of children all ran up at the same time to hug the character. I placed the camera up to face to take Eddie’s picture and when I took the camera away he was gone. The character walked away and all the children disappeared as fast as they had appeared. I became stiff with fear.
“Eddie” I called. Afraid to move I began to turn around, and around calling Eddie. Other concerned mothers began asking me; what does he have on, what does he look like? One mother suggested that I go to the lost and found. That was not option. I was not going to leave the spot that I last saw my son. Now I knew how Jodie Foster’s character felt in the movie Flight Plan, when she thought she lost her daughter in the airport.
I began calling for Eddie for what seemed like a year. I screamed out for him, each time louder and more authoritive than before, hoping that he would answer me. Or that whoever may have grabbed him would let him go and bring my son back to me. I was beginning to think of all kinds of scenarios. I thought how could I go home without my son. I thought about the many other parents who have lost their children to kidnappers and never saw there children again. I thought about every parent who has lost a child and have to live the rest of their lives without their precious child. I thought about my life without Eddie and I began to get angry and called one more time to him as if I could move mountains with my voice. Finally from a distance I saw a woman emerge from the crowd holding the hand of a little boy. I could tell from where I was that it was Eddie. I called to him one more time, this time more relieved than sounding like a desperate mother. She turned him over to me, and I don’t even think I said thank you in my relief that my son was back in my arms.
Every time now when I hold my son, I hold him knowing that I am blessed to have a son and blessed each day that he is in my life. Any moment could be our last time together and I want to make sure that I don’t waste any time not loving my son.
Do I still get angry with him, when he is disobedient; yes. But still I love him and cherish his very existence. And then there is that song that rings in my head every time I think of Eddie, “People let me tell you ‘bout my best friend”.
The Stages of Parenting
When it comes to parenting, it often seems that history repeats itself. Things you did when your child was a baby seem strangely familiar when the same child is a teen.
Beauty
Beauty
1 Peter 3: 1-7
Thought For Today: 1 Peter 3:3 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.”
I remember as a child an advertisement for a brand of tennis shoes. These shoes advertised that a person would run faster and jump higher. But, in reality these were just shoes-they had no special abilities. In today’s society people are trying to do something to improve their abilities and appearance. People buy brand name clothing, color their hair and pierce their bodies. In reality-they are probably just as miserable on the inside as they are on the outside.The Bible teaches that beauty comes inside the heart. God looks at the heart. Where is your peace and beauty coming from? Do you now Jesus as your Lord and savior? Prayer: Lord help us to seek the inner beauty and not to focus on the outer beauty. Please, examine my heart and help me to confirm to your image. Amen.
Brainy Babies - Does Music Really Work?
Does music really help babies become smarter? The jury is still out on this one. However, it certainly couldn’t hurt. Just ask all of the parents who have sat up at 2:00 a.m. singing a song to an upset and crying baby.
What we do know is that music affects all of us in different ways, mostly which are positive.
